Sweet Daffy sent me the following email.
I forwarded it over to Steve and he replied (in red).
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED by Saturday, July 25, 2009NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS,
CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays–Step by Step, with Slide
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
I get a waiver due to an automatic ice dispenser in the freezer.
The Toilet Paper Roll–Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
Due to the difficulty of this, one a sign will be generated above the toilet paper roll to eliminate my responsibility as follows:
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The
Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?–Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
Does this include sword fights*?Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The
Floor–Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
I may need more than 3 weeks. I even bought more hampers and they still don’t pick up my clothes.
Dinner Dishes–Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM
Why get married then?
Loss Of Identity–Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help
Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM
This problem has also been solved. I have 3 spare universal remotes**.
Learning How To Find Things–Starting With Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
Sign me up!
Health Watch–Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your
Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Allergies – It is a heredity thing. I can’t control nature.
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost–Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined
N-S-E-W: Men understand how to use a compass. I sometimes just take the long way because I never know what new things I may find.
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
4 weeks, Saturdays noon, 2 hours.
I need help with this one. I get the feeling similar to a cross between embarrassment and I actually may die***.
Learning to Live–Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. On-line
Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined
Not sure about this one. Need more info.
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation
and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Sign Stephanie up****
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy–Remembering Anniversaries and Other
Important Dates and Calling When You’re Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock
Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:0 0 PM for 2 hours.
Well I wait until Stephanie looks angry then I check the calender. Its like an ANDON signal.Class 14
The Stove/Oven–What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Is that the thing under the Microwave?
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to
*This is where two men pee at the same time and “fight” with urine. And this is not gay?
** I (Stephanie) would like to mention that the bedroom remote has been MIA for a week now and we’ve been watching The Biography Channel because neither one of us wants to get back out of bed to change the channel.
*** I (Stephanie) HATE driving driving with Steve. I.E. “Why are you tailgating?”, “Could you stop any faster?”, “You missed a spot right there?”, “You DO know what the speed limit is here, don’t you?”, “We’ll never get there if you keep driving below the speed limit.”, “Don’t you need to get gas?”
**** I (Stephanie) am notorious for being a pissy little brat when we go shopping. I just hate people.