Because my brain is, quite literally, going to explode at any moment, here are some SUPER FUN! tidbits of my week.
(We have restrooms for each gender on each floor. The 6th floor men’s room is unlocked all the time and almost every other floor is locked. Most of the men in my office use the 6th floor. We also have two restroom keys.)
Constant Comment: Which of these keys is for the men’s room?
Me, trying not to grab my crotch and give the “how the hell should I know?!” face: I’m guessing the red [lanyard] one.
CC: This one? (holds up the blue one)
me: Nope, pretty sure it’s the other one.
CC: Which one do the women use?
me: The blue one.
CC: BUT BLUE IS FOR BOYS!
CC, after spending a good five minute rummaging in the storage closet: These little tag things [adhesive “flags”], where do we have them?
me: Oh, well, I’m pretty much the only one who uses them, so there aren’t any extra and I have them at my desk.
CC, disappointed as a boy who just found out Santa isn’t real: Oh.
me: Do you need some?
CC: Sure, yeah! Blue, Green, whatever color! (I peel off a lump of yellow tags) THESE are YELLOW. Fine. Whatever.
CC: Well, there are MORE revisions to this proposal.
CC, in true dramarama fashion: NOWWWWW they give us the contract number, so all the places where there isn’t a contract number need to have the number put in.
me, trying so very hard not to say something inappropriate: Okay.
CC continues random whining
me: ‘sno big deal, I’ll make the changes.
CC, in full on THE SKY IS FALLING mode: WELL IT’S A BIG DEAL TO ME! NOWWWW we have to go review the WHOLE THING ALL OVER AGAIN.
Oh, by the way, this exact same document had no less than 11 revisions prior to this. I keep documentation.
CC: We need to take out “B”.
CC: So that means that what was “C” is going to be “B”.
me: I understand.
CC: …and what was “D” is now “C”…
me: Yes. I understand.
See, I view “Intense Overexplaination” as a subtle way to say, “You royally screwed this up last time you fucking idiot and I’m going to spell it out for you so it doesn’t happen again.
Execpt in this case, there was no screw up.
Is it in bad taste to make a daisy chain of how many days are left until CC’s tenure is up?
(it’s 7, btw)