Old Dog, New Trick OR Taming The Monster

30 04 2009

Bailey has an obsession.
Well, obsessions is more like it, but today  I’m going to focus on her Major Obsession.

Balls.
(no, you perv)

om nom nom

om nom nom

Tennis balls. Rope Balls. Kong Balls. Planet Dog Balls.

Seriously, she can not go outside without dashing around the yard, looking for something for us to throw at to her. Have to admit, she’s quite daft at catching.
But this OBSESSION makes it hard to get anything done.
Not only can she catch, but she can throw.
If you don’t pay attention to her and she wants to play, she will throw the ball at you until it hits you. If you still ignore her (because, say, you’re trying to hold a conversation with the neighbors/playing volleyball/planting) she will yell at you.
“BORF!”

This dog is CRAZY. She must get it from me.

Because she runs so much, it’s hard to keep her water bowl full/free from other critters.
While at a local farm store (huh-yup!) I found this dandy device.

slurp

slurp

Ideally, she would walk up to the device, lick it, a stream of water comes trickling out and she can drink at her leisure.

Well, she’s a bit, dumb, and needs help.
Pretty much, this is how it went down last night.

I am decked in flip-flops, sweatpants and ratty ass-sweatshirt. Pocket of sweatshirt has treats. I pretty much knew I was going to end up dirty/wet/unhappy so why mess up a clean pair of pants?
Bailey is still sporting Bank-Robber-Bandanna. She’s racing around the yard, looking for a ball, while I position myself as to not get drenched or stepped on.

me: Baaaailllllyy
Bailey: BALL! Where is it?
me: Commer!
Bailey: BALL! I left it somewhere…
me: Commer!
Bailey: I have to pee.
me: Okay.
(meanwhile, the neighbors puppy has broken free from her collar and is tearing up our yards. I catch and return her. Meanwhile, Bailey is concerned that Elle (the puppy) is going to find her ball and take it.)
Bailey: Look mom!  BALL!
me: yeah yeah. Come closer… “give kisses” [pointing to spigot]
Bailey: I’ll kiss you! (kisses* on cheek)
me: I love you too!
Bailey: BALL! (I toss the ball)
me: Kisses here!
Bailey: BALL!
me, taking the ball and pushing it against spigot thing: Drink! Good Girl!
Bailey, taking a muddy paw, bats my hand away: NO!
me: take nice! drink! good girl!
Bailey, backing up: BORF!
me: Well come here and take nice!
Bailey: BORF BORF! (I throw the ball)
me, taking the returned wet, slimy ball and placing it high on the deck where she can’t get it: Bailey. Come. Drink! Good Girl.
Bailey, puts her head on my arm, then my shoulder, gives kisses: Mommy, I loves you!
me: Aw, I love you too. Drink! (tapping the spigot)
Bailey: You’re the bestest mommy ever!
me: Aw, thanks! What’s this?!?! (tapping spigot)
Baily stares longingly over my shoulder: Ball.

Less to say, training shall resume tonight.

* “kisses” for all of you “EWWW you let your dog kiss you?!?!” is pretty much her wiping her snout on your cheek. Like you did with a relative you were forced to kiss.

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7 responses

30 04 2009
Connie

I think you should lick the spigot so Baily can learn and make sure you get Bailey to take a picture 🙂

30 04 2009
Stephanie of Stopbouncing

Hey, Connie, I have something you can kiss. (neeneer neener)

30 04 2009
morethananelectrician

Yes, I am ini agreement…licking the spigot is the only way to make this work.

30 04 2009
daisyfae

she throws? that’s a good ‘stupid pet trick’ for letterman. mr. pickles likes to try to steal tennis balls from the dog park. when we get ready to leave, he’ll run around collecting 3 in his mouth to take home. i have to frisk him on the way out. clepto-dog….

1 05 2009
Dennis the Vizsla

hello stephanie its dennis the vizsla dog hay it sownds like bailey and my gud frend dozer wood get along just fine!!! i meen as long as their were enuf balls to go arownd ha ha ok bye

1 05 2009
Tony

Dixie has the same kinda ball obsession too. she drives us nuts with it sometimes

1 05 2009
Stephanie of Stopbouncing

[@ MTAE/Connie] Steve supposedly slathered the thing in “the rest of the chunky blue cheese”. He insists that it was for science and she now understands. Though, a blue cheese spigot would be neat.

[@ daisyfae] Oh, she throws alright. It’s cute until she tosses something solid (like her rope ball). There was a time when I was curled up in the pappasan and she threw all of her favorite toys into the chair; to cheer me up. Then, it’s freaking cute. She also can fit upwards of three balls in her mouth. Maybe that’s why Mr. Pickles REALLY likes her.

[@ dennisthevizsla] Bailey told me to tell you, “You can no has my balls! MIIINNEEE! BORF!”

[@ Tony] It’s maddening isn’t it?!

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