And This Time… Will be the Last Time…

6 01 2009
Previously, I had posted about two jerk patrons of the parking lot.

Not to Scale (the gray splotches are drainage pipes/support poles)

This is a non-space-specific lot (there aren’t any lines painted because it’s gravel).
I park against the fence, as to maximize the aisle space.
For the past few weeks, there have been these two JERKS (“Jerk” and “Huge Jerk”) who park next to this drain pipe/highway support pole.
The pole is towards the corner of the lot.
If Jerk and Huge Jerk were small cars (like, say a Fiat) there would probably not be a problem.  However, Jerk drives a Yukon (which is the size of a mature redwood tree) and Huge Jerk drives some full-sized sedan P.O.S.*
I arrive first, parking against the fence and when I get to Y.O.T at the end of the day, Jerk and Huge Jerk are still parked.  Sometimes Jerk arrives before me, but does not park against the fence.
Consequently, it requires some daft maneuvering to get out of my spot.  And it’s not just me, the vehicles on either side of me (and even a bit down the row) have to perform 100-point turns to get out.
Yesterday was a frustrating day and I had had enough.  Especially knowing how  my temper is**.

“Hello, Parking Lot Company.”
“Hi there, I park in lot ABC and while I know the lot is not marked and there aren’t any assigned spaces, there are these two vehicles which are parked in such a way as to make it near impossible for other patrons to get out.”
“Oh.  My.  Okay, what’s the plate  number?”
“I didn’t think to get it, but I have the permit number, 123.  That is the sedan.  I don’t have the number of the other vehicle.”
“I’ll have the lot manager go in tomorrow and place citations on the vehicles, informing them not to park in that area.”
“Thank you.”

*P.O.S: Piece of Shit
** There was an incident when I was renting a room in a house with stupid rude neighbors whose kids would drop kitchen chairs from the window so they could sneak out.  One day, I was pissy and decided not to move the chair, thus running my car into the house.  True story.




6 responses

6 01 2009

i don’t know why, but i had a flashback to the movie “Fried Green Tomatoes”… but i guess you’re not insured enough to indulge in that destructive fantasy, eh?

keep after them. idiots like that need smacked a few times before they get a clue… yeah, even if one is bought for them.

SB: are clues next to vowels? I’m just wondering who they are to be SO IMPORTANT to park where they do.

6 01 2009

Maybe you should cut back on the coffee?

Better idea. Find the guys (assuming they are men) and flirt with them while you walk to the vehicles. When they get their monster vehicle, act surprised and let them know that they would have had a chance if they weren’t so inconsiderate to other people.

Denial is a good way to fix things.

SB: Hmmmmm…. denial? Dooooo telll *snark*

7 01 2009

I was just thinking of blogging about my “traffic” pet peeves including parking lot idiots! I just want to write all over their cars with lipstick…but then I don’t want to ruin the lipstick on jerks!!!

8 01 2009

Looks like it is time for you to invest in a beater! Then park uber close to them so that they have to make a 30 point turn to get out, or can’t get in the vehicle, or close to the Yukon so that he can’t see you and hits your car upon exiting. It is a beater, so who cares about the damage!

SB: !!! YOT (Ye Olde Trailblazer) is not a beater! Great, now you’ve hurt his feelings. And I have a feeling that Jerk and Huge Jerk wouldn’t care if they hit YOT.

8 01 2009

I used to think that it required two cars to create a parking lot jam, but the idiots at the place I frequent proved that you only need one.

SB: Amazing what stupid people can accomplish. Scary what happens when they get together.

10 01 2009

I wasn’t saying to use YOT, I meant to buy one. You get something that barely runs, like an 88 Chevy Caprice. Run that bad boy right into the side.

It’s then better to take off the license plates and leave it, but I suppose you could just drive away.

SB: I can has loan?

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