A Bridge Too Far

22 09 2008

Previously, I had slight tinges of “I wonder how they’re doing without me.”
Not that I think the world stops spinning if I’m not someplace…
That thought passed through my head today while I was next to the high speed copier.
A week after starting here.

Previously, I had been panged with guilt.
“What if…”s circled my thoughts.  They ranged from doubt [about the new position] to remorse (“how bad was it… really?”) to failure (“I don’t want to have to go back to where I have a track record if this fails…”)
This time, it’s been “What if I feel fortunate?”
What if I enjoy (as much as one can) my job?
What if this was the best thing I could have done?

It’s been a week and I’ve already mastered the tricky restroom key, the copier, the storage room, who to ask for what and who is high-strung.  My compulsive eatinghas GREATLY subsided and I’m not scroungingaround for food because I need something to do.
Holy crap.

I mean, I didn’t bound out of bed this morning WOOT!ing that it was Monday and if it hadn’t been for my sinus infection and/or the mysterious shrinking of all my pants (“Damn you beer!”), I would have been breezing out of the door.

I no longer check to make sure I feel good enough to go to work… I used to wake up disappointed if I didn’t feel ill.
Tonight, depending how my sinuses feel, I’ll hit the gym.

It’s not even like I’m overwhelmed, it’s just, nice.  Nice to feel wanted.  Nice to needed.  Nice to feel competent.  Nice to be talked to.  Nice to be asked to do things.
It’s just.  Nice.

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3 responses

22 09 2008
thegnukid

Wheee! that’s gotta be a great feeling… congrats… but—

…a week and I’ve already mastered the tricky restroom key…

…ummm… what did you do BEFORE you mastered the key? 😉

SB Sez: let’s just say that the potted plants never looked better.

23 09 2008
curlywurlygurly

stephanie, is that YOU?!?! i barely recognize you because your post is so hopeful and happy!!! hahahahha. kidding.

i love hearing about the new job and that you’re happy there. i hope things continue to go swimmingly for you!

SB Sez: I know! Right? Sometimes I have to look in the mirror to realize that it’s still me.

23 09 2008
Michele

Yeah! I’m so glad that you are liking your new job and that it is making you so happy. You deserve that. You deserve to feel appreciated at your job when you work hard! I think the job switch has turned out to be a wonderful change for you!

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