Converstations are Not Based in Reality

10 09 2008

We’re driving to get some ink for the printer and we’re discussing the day.  (BTW, this is after I had a MONSTER of a migraine that left me unable to communicate beyond, “No” and “Fine.”)
me: So, let’s say that you had a customer named “The Major Deal.”  Where would you file their paperwork?
him, thinking for a millisecond: With other “M”s
me: Yeah, okay… so I file in “M” and someone else files in “T” and I got lectured about how it should be filed in “M”, which I stated that I do, and someone else moves them to “T”.
him, confused: Why would you even file that in “T”?  “The” isn’t even really a word in that case.
me: I know, right?!  Then, the mis-filer says in a boisterous voice, “‘The Major Deal’ starts with “The” and gets filed under “T”.”  I just shook my head because (sing song) It’s not my problem anymore!!!

We get ink and being part of a buyers program, we get a free ream of paper.
me: Wow, a nine-ninety-nine value!  Free!  With your purchase!
him: Paper costs that much?!
me: Um, yes… I mean, you can go to an office supply store and get it for like $3-$6 a ream.
him: Wow, I didn’t realize…
So now, I can see this scenario in this head…
“Presidential Candidate Mr. Mak, the People think that you’re out of touch with the cost of living.  Please, tell us, how much do you think a ream of document-quality paper costs?”
“Um, like, a buck-fiddy?”

We stop and get gas and money as it’s the last “BurritoMobile” day for me and I’m dealing with a major salt craving.  Stupid PMS.
me: Say, can you take me out for ice cream?
him, astounded: WHAT?
me: I’m not saying you have to get any.
him: I don’t really care for ice cream.
me: I KNOW.  We’re already in the truck, I’m just asking you to take me there.
We arrive at the ice cream stand, along with most of the Orchard Park JV Volleyball team.
him: What are you getting
me (BTW, I hate this question… are you making my Nerds Avalanche?  No.): What are you getting?
him: I think I want a Nerds Avalanche.
me: Bastard!  That’s what I’m getting!
him: And one of those cotton candy dot things.
me: AND?
him: yeah.
me: I thought you didn’t want ice cream.
him: …




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