Adventures with Homeless Man: Cupcake Factory

25 08 2008

A few months ago, a, well, a vagrant came into the office looking for a job.
I humored him with an application to avoid falling into the whole discrimination thing.

It’s my first day back and who comes stumbling in, but Homeless Man.  (I do not know if he really is homeless or not, but he smells and looks the part).
Homeless Man: You got my application?
me: It’s on file, yes.
HM: I’m really anxious for this job.
me: The owner has your application and I do not know if he’s even  hiring.
HM: I need this job… (mumbling) welfare, kids…
me: I am not in charge of hiring but your application is on file.
HM: Well, can I get a cup of coffee then?
me, lying: We don’t have coffee up here[in the office].
HM: Well, how ’bout a cupcake?
me, taken aback: We don’t have cupcakes either.
HM: Change?  How about some spare change?
me: No.

Okay, so, why did I lie about the coffee thing?  I had a feeling that if I caved and gave him coffee, he’d be back everyday, stinking up the place, expecting coffee.

Cupcakes?  Really?

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5 responses

25 08 2008
curlywurlygurly

so you work in a bakery? lol. now i want a cupcake too. hmm…maybe i’ll bake some cupcakes. oh, sorry…i zoned out for a second.

anyway, you did a good job shutting down the homeless guy. he’s probably thirsty and hungry now thanks to you. hahahahahah.

god, i’m evil. seriously. i need therapy.

Replace “bakery” with “woodworking” and you’re on the money. Nothing in the office/general three mile radius even smells like cupcakes.

25 08 2008
Shopguy

We had a 3 day cupcake party while you were gone, and invited the whole block over.

meh! Oh, I already know about Taco Truck Wednesday and now you spring this on me?! I guess I won’t ever go on vacation again.

25 08 2008
Melissa

WTF???????

I can has job now? No? I can has cupcake?

29 08 2008
Mr. Bill

mmmmmmmmmmmmmm cupcakes…. the word of your cupcake cake has spread across the land, no telling how many vagrants will be awaiting your arrival Monday morning.

Dude, like that South Park… “change? chhhhannnge!”

29 08 2008
Stephanie of Stopbouncing

Homeless Man just stopped back in.

So, I give the WTF arms to The Boss, who has been listening/watching, when HM leaves… “Yeah, so next time he comes around, can SOMEONE give him the heave-ho? KThnx.”

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