Injuries Obtained this Weekend

9 06 2008

1) While tilling the gardens down, rocks fly from the blades.  Also, I strained my wrists by holding the tiller back.  Garden:0, Stephanie:1, Tiller:3

2) While flipping seasoned steaks on the grill, a peppercorn came off and landed on my hand.  Peppercorn:1, soft fleshing hand:0.

3) Things are going swimingly, despite the grocery store being PACKED.  I’m on my final run from the freezer to the check-out.  It’s crowded.  People are turning into and out of aisles at crazy unsafe speeds.  I’m being tailgated by some guy who must be very important.
Already limping around and in fact, I have my bum ankle wrapped up and I’m trying to be extra cautious.  I would have like to be able to say the same for the guy behind me.
Not only does he hit my in the ankle with the cart, he hits me in my Achilles tendon, on my inflamed side.
“Oops.” He says.  “Sorry.”
I didn’t even say, “That’s okay” because you know what, it wasn’t.  Had I not already been limping, or wrapped or in a very purple shirt, I would have been accepting.
Back at the ranch, the ice bag and I made friends with some pain reliever and I pondered the most insincere apology ever.
Shopping cart:1, Stephanie: 0

4) Multiple bites on lower lip due to horrific nightmares about watching people die.  Stephanie:1, Stephanie:0




3 responses

9 06 2008

you are a hazard to yourself. you need to do like i do to prevent the injuries:

1. hire some handsome gardners to do the work. you make a pitcher of iced tea.

2. don’t eat peper. it’s evil. i don’t like it. if you were me, you won’t have been burned by a rogue peppercorn.

3. grocery shop in the wee hours of the night. no one goes to the store at midnight unless they are PMSing and need chocolate or are high and have the munchies. you have the aisles to yourself. sadly, the deli is usually closed, but you don’t need that poison lunchmeat anyway.

feel better!

9 06 2008

note to self: PEPPER has 2 Ps in it. duh.

9 06 2008

dear god. could i please proofread before posting a comment? in #2: if you were me, you WOULDN’T…

i’m going to hide under a rock now. thanks.

The angel on my left shoulder says, “You should be nice and correct the errors.” The devil on my right shoulder throws his pitchfork at the angel and says “Hey. You laughed.” And then points out that your hand is “fleshy” and not “fleshing”.

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