Vying for the Next Season of Top Chef

12 02 2008

me: Can you slice these [apples and pears] on the mandolin for me?
him: Okay.  (he looks at me blankly)
me: apples.  pears.  mandolin.  slice?
him: So, wait, what do I do now?
me: Take a piece of fruit.
him: Okay.  (holds an apple)
me: Now, cut off a bit of the bottom so you have an even surface.  (he looks at me, still holding the apple) Get a knife.
him: (walks to the knife block) This one?
me: Sure. (growing tired)
him: Where should I cut it?
me: The counter is fine.
him: (slices a piece off) Is this good?
me: No, try and cut it so that the bottom core is gone.
him: (cuts again) Better?
me: Yes.  (growing annoyed)
him: Now what?
me: Take the fruit in your dominate hand.
him: Which one is that?
me: The one you write with.
him: Which one is that?
me: Your.  Right.  One.
him: Now what?
me: Seriously?  (he looks at me blankly)  How did you make it this far through life?  (he smirks, knowing he’s getting to me)  Okay, take your left hand and hold the handle of the mandolin.
him: Okay.
me: And using even, steady pressure, drag the fruit over the blade.  And watch your knuckles.
him: Why?
me: Because that’s a blade and will hurt and if anyone knows about hand injuries, it’s me.
him: So true.

Sometimes I can’t tell if he’s really that clueless about somethings (he IS an engineer after all), if he’s making it hard on me so I never ask him to do whatever it is again or if he’s such a perfectionist that he needs to be certain that he’s doing it right.




One response

13 02 2008

Oh, I think he knows very well what to do…but if he acts like he doesn’t then you will get frustrated thus doing it yourself and allowing him some quality ‘couch and tv’ time! I hate it when they do that!

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